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Tuesday, August 26, 2008

back to post...just to update...

i've been retained as a yr 1 student le...hahas all my own fault for being too lazy alreay...so ppl dun evr follow in my footstep...lol!

school's started starting to get adapted...thou i know i have to study hard but recent spat of incidents have been making lose my mood to do anything n i mean EVERYTHING...

i feel kinda stressed up...i think my hairs are gonna turn white soon...dunno what i m truly thinking abt right now just knoe that i've lost interest in this world alr...

my uncle has been hospitalised for the past few weeks due to work accident...was hit by some crane onto his back whle at work...had 2 operations due to internal bleeding of his large intestines and also to insert some metal into his backbone...we were so scared that he'll bcum paralysed but thank god i believe all shuld be fine for the moment...he show us his wound last nite n i saw his body being cut from his chest all e way to below his tummy and e wounds were stapled back by big staples!and they hadn totally healed so it was kinda gruesome...*heartpain* he tried to crack joke abt it but i felt so much like crying then...

mei mei broke up with her bf and i with mine too....i dunno whether am i simply asking for too much or whether there is a problem btw us two...i dun like e way he do cartain things and he dont like e way abt mi too...it make mi feel really dejected bcoz i really love him alot but i guess it will be kinda hard alr....

quarrelled with mei mei's bf...he made mi feel so maddened by his actions...not respecting my sis by bringing other girls to his hm not once but dunno how many times and sill dare to kepp blaming mei mei...quarrelled till he came to insult mi n him..made mi so pissed off evn more...i tried to show him e msges but all he said was 'show mi another time bah' and went off to play with other ppl alr...

realised that this few times whenever i drink alittle over e limit, i cudn control my emotions anymore...made mi hate myself alot...feel as thou i'm so useless to be overwhelm by my feelings so easily...

i feel so scared to b home at night...i hate it when my mum keep asking this and that...i know she cares but she is simply making feel evn more worse off by doing such things...i miss him alot i miss e days alot =(

~ { 16:39 }
marssh